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Band/Singer Quotes Page 1
"Sorry, mom I like to make out!"
"These are.nice socks"
"Music is supposed to be an escape, It's supposed to be somewhere you can go, where you can be yourself, or be whatever you wanna be."
"Good Charlotte is anger management teen angst."
"Those people who shun us just because of the label we're on, or the fact
that we've got a video out there that's getting us somewhere, are only limiting themselves, because they aren't keeping an open mind. Besides, no band has ever given us shit for our career path. It's mostly just jaded punkers. And if that's the way they're gonna be, I'd rather have someone who doesn't know a thing about punk coming to our shows, 'cause they're the ones who like it for what it is, not for what it isn't."
"Punk rockers have feelings too!"
"Have we ever murdered a boy band? YES! There was a boy band named P-Town and we shot them."
"Life is Benji, The rest is just details . Benji is Life. I have what you want."
"I'm lost."
"Malibu Stacey! Malibu Stacey! I would be Malibu Stacey. She has a nice car."
"Bloody Barbie."
"I would be the barbie with the interchangeable boobs." "I'm just in the band."
"Yeah of course, the boxers are yummy and it's the bacon that gets the gals! No wait…it's the other way around."
"Now I sound like a News broadcaster"
"You know, I just like to keep it all in the family."
"[During] the first song we looked at each other and we were like, 'this is what we're doing,'" remembers Joel. "From then on we just wanted to rock."
"Yo mommas fatter than a crackmonkey.wait nevermind.corny 'yo momma' joke. "
"He's ummm. a pitbull?"
"Dude, I just wanna break one of these off."
"I just wanna break one of these off."
"First gig in three months I'm not nervous."
"Benji usually tries to match his hair with his underwear, and you know how he had the pink hair for a while well we caught him in a pink thong one day!"
"Joel even though everyone makes fun of you , your still doing a good job."
"When I heard Nirvana, it changed my life."
"My mom is Christian, and she wouldn't let us listen to rock music. So me and my brother, we had this tape player with head phones, and we locked ouselves in the pantry. We were fighting over the headphones, sitting in the dark pantry listening to Metallica."
"Although I consider myself a punk rocker, Billy (guitar) listens to alot of metal, paul (bass) is into the Pixies and Sabadoh, and my brother worships Morrissey"
"Life is Benjithe rest is just detailsBenji is life"
"When I heard Nirvana, it changed my life." "My mom is Christian, and she wouldn't let us listen to rock music. So me and my brother, we had this tape player with head phones, and we locked ouselves in the pantry. We were fighting over the headphones, sitting in the dark pantry listening to Metallica." "Although I consider myself a punk rocker, Billy (guitar) listens to alot of metal, paul (bass) is into the Pixies and Sabadoh, and my
brother worships Morrissey"
"I'm kinda disappointed that Canada isn't like the South Park movie said it was."
"You guys have been in the studio too long.I remember when we were making our first record I'd be like "If you do that.one more time.I'll.uh.lick your balls!" yea.It's only gay if you swallow!"
"Girls! Like you.Boys! Like me.Girls! Like Joel!"
"People come up to me and say "Can I have a Paul hug?".WHAT THE HECK IS A PAUL HUG!?!?"
"I'm learning Italian.Gratzie!"
"We have cousins from Chicago.Mest!"
"Dude.I took one of your shirts."
"What? You guys got make-up!?! Ohhhhh."
"We have to go get ready for the show."-Joel of Good Charlotte
"Joel.do you wear a cup on stage?"
"These guys ride motorcycles.do you think I'm stupid for calling them motorcycles?"
"We can say anything? ANYTHING? Okay.who wants to fuck Billy?"-Joel of Good Charlotte
"Your on your own Biatch!"
"Im the self proclaimed leader of the band. Self proclaimed." "If you want me to wait I'll wait for you Benji says its about his dog so you know I have no clue." "This band is kinda like a marriage. Me and Benj exspecially." "Joel is laid back and innocent but sometimes its like dude come on." "They think Im funny ma." "I'm the bass player, no one has a crush on the bass player." "I'm the one that tries to make jokes and no body laughs at. The kids are laughing at Paul not With Paul." - Paul on himself
"There are some people i'd take a bullet for, and some people i'd like to put a bullet in."
"I was just in the middle of singing a song about how broke we were and now my cell phone rings."
"You need a life bro"
"Bonjour, biotch! Au revior, boitch!"
"Don't worry mom . I am still a virgin."
"This is the makeout song. Although you should ask the person first 'cause I've had some troubles with that before."
"You can only start a boyband if you kill one of the ones already out there."
"I think that our goal in Good Charlotte is just to be Good Charlotte, and whatever happens, whatever that means, we don't even know, we just push on and tour and make music and do whatever."
"We're all music fans and we just love being in a band, and that's why we do it."
"I'm scared of cops.!"
"We spend a majority of the show after the playing just walking around the crowd and meeting kids. Kids are like 'Why do you do this?' And we all say, 'Well, if it wasn't for you guys, we'd be nothing.' It's like it makes sense to us just to hang out cause we like to."
"1 egg, 1 sperm.2 babies!"
"I sell out every day. I say give me a five dollars and I'll give you a kiss."
"I fell off the stage and all my clothes fell off! And I wet my pants, but they fell off, so I couldn't wet them, so it must have been the kid standing next to me."
"You know who else likes making out? Sum 41. I know from first hand experience. Or. my friend does."
"I dropped an anvil on Benji."
"I'd do anything for him."
"I sell out everyday. I say: give me five bucks, and I'll give you a kiss."
"I don't know how your gonna take this, but Santa Claus isn't real, Bro."
"In 10th grade, I kissed your girlfriend. But don't worry, I didn't like it. She used too much tounge."
"I think Benj is a little bit more outgoing and in your face. I'm a little bit more reserved and quiet and conservative in some ways. Benj is wild, you never know what to except out of him. He's out of control sometimes, and that's the way he is and I love him for it. I wouldn't change one thing about him. We're just like Ying and Yang, me and him, like night and day sometimes. He's really outspoken and he says what he thinks right away. He's got strong opinions and he's very hard core about being um… he's not straight-edged, like he doesn't call himself straight-edged but he is just very extreme. Whatever he does is extreme and I'm not quite as much like that."
"I think the terrorists are just idiots."
"One time I ripped Joel's nipples off! One time I pierced Paul's butt cheeks together!"
"I don't really think there is such a thing as a band selling out."
Joel: We're in a band called Good Charlotte
Joel: about 3/4 of our band is vegitarian so
Benji: Heyyy, welcome back to All Things Rock, we're from the band Good Charlotte. There Joel, I said it!
Joel: I think if they had a California music award for show hosts, we'd win.
"And me and Joel were thinking that we should change our band to be rap medal so we could be rich too. I'd buy 6 cars."
"Most bands break up after one record, or two--our second record is about to come out. We're not broken up! *smiles*"
Benji: (While reading a post from the ATR Message Board) We also agree that Benji is the best host.
'Yes, it's the greatest one hour of tv you'll ever see!"
Joel: Go to the MTV All Things Rock message board.
"P.S. Benji is a better host than Joel."
Joel: Welcome to All Things Rock, I'm Joel.
Joel: Well you can go to mtv.com, you can go to the message board there
Joel: Go to mtv.com and tell us what you think of the show.
Joel: Matt filled in for him last year when he got injured in a mugging.
Joel: Every band dreams of that.I know our band does; we don't have a platinum record!
"You know, if one kid bought a record for every one kid that said I suckthat'd be a lot of platinum records, man!"
Benji: I started buying records kinda late. I got Nirvana's "Nevermind", Rancid's first record, Joel got MC Hammer.
"It's a lot of fun, the Internet. I think it's gonna be big."
Joel: I really love Dashboard, if you don't have the cd you should really check it out.
Benji: I like dark videos, I got Frankenstein on my shirt.
Joel: Welcome back to All Things Rock. I'm Joel and this is Benji.
Benji: Welcome back to the best show on MTV, and we are the best hosts!
Joel: Hey, you're watching All Things Rock and I'm one half of your hosts, Joel.
Graffiti's good kids. Get out there!"
Benji: We are back!
Joel: What do you think Benj?
Benji: You know, personally, I haven't had any problems with being married and being on tour.
Benji: (talking about buying a cd) You can go to your local Target store
Joel: I told you we knew NFG! I told you!
Benji: (responding to a post) I just want to say that if I was on the message board, if I do post, my name would be a lot cooler than All Things Benji. Sorry, its not me.
Benji: I sorta feel like when people compare me to Joel, even though he's my twin, its like kicking me in the face and then punching me again.
Benji: And the next video comes from Joel's favorite band in history, Default.
Benji: I'm Benji, this is my brother Joel, and you're watching my show. (skip ahead to the post)
Joel: Well my grandmother is a big fan of Good Charlotte. We're for the grannies.
Benji: Well, let's take a look at Papa Roach's She Loves Me Not, and Joel.please don't sing along.
Joel: Anthony Keidas (of red hot chilli peppers), good guy, I know him personally.
Benji: I found a shocking one.
Benji: (talking about people requesting a song a lot) Which means Joel here has been spending a lot of time on his laptop. A-HA! (total fake laugh)
Benji: I have my foot on the monitor. Benji: Hey everyone this is All Things Rock, I'm Scott Stapp. (smiles) I'm just kidding, I'm Benji and this is Joel. (Benji starts cracking up laughing!)
Joel: What do you think of that Scott?
Joel: I'mI'm Joel and this is Benji
Joel: We'll still be on the Warped Tour.
Benji: Hey kids, do not change the channel or I will kill you. (Joel is laughing and shaking his head)
Joel: And don't forget. Joel: (speaking to the band Quarashi) Do you guys ever get tired of Benj trying to sleep on your bus?
Joel: We're on the tour all summer long with these guys. We actually shower together and stuff, it's great.
Joel: We're standing here on this mosaic--
"Tom Cruise is soooo dreamy!."
Benji: They're going to be in LA
Benji: Have you seen Kid Rock's new beer commercial?
Joel: .and this is from their '97 album, 'Nimrod'
Benji: (reading a post) Benji and Joel, can you guys hug?
"Hey! You're watching All Things Rock, which is my show, and I'm Benji. *Looks at Joel* Aren't you glad I let you hang out sometimes?"
Joel: So watch the VMAs, hosted by Jimmy Fallon
Benji: He's got those fake tattoos I don't know if I'm down with that. Ya see, these aren't real.
"Change the channel and die. (smiles)"
Joel: Hey everyone, welcome back. I'm Joel, and this is my brother Benji.
Benji: (talking about lead singer of the White Stripes) he says he doesn't have any ASSperations to become a big movie star.
Joel: We're doin' this spankin' new style this week.
Joel: *says something about some video director*
Benji: You probably shouldn't punch the floor on stage while you're angry.(points to Joel) you should punch your brother, that's what brothers are for, you should hit your brother.
(Benji and Joel talking to The Halo Friendlies about bowling)
Benji: They said the track was written about the overwhelming temptations of stardom.
Benji: (stops talking and listens to anouncer in bowling alley) They just called for the ball boy, Joel.
Benji: (talking about his equipment).which you probably can't see 'cause of a lot of stains from fruits and tomatoes and other various items thrown at me while I'm on stage.
Interviewer: So Benji, I hear you love Kasey Chambers
Benji: YAYAYAYAYAYAYA BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH!!! (screaming)
Paul:.[looks behind us] What are you doing? Why am I doing two interviews and you're not doing any?
(When Benji was asked what Joel was hopeless at) "I got my first drum kit when I was 3," he says. "I don't know how musical it was, but I banged." - Dusty
Joel: You guys got make up?
"We never thought we'd leave the basement!"
"I think we're a hair band now.
"Do we even play music now? Nah!
Benji: Doin whatever we wanna do, sayin whatever we wanna say.
"We promised we'd let you guys ask us whatever you want today, just nothing too personal, my mom's watching. Yes Mom, I'm still a virgin!"
Fan: What's your newest tattoo and where is it?
Benji: Now Joel, our family wasn't bad was it?
Benji:Ahh the memories, it seems like it was only last week.
"Do you know how much stuff it takes to make my hair stay up?!?!"
"My comment on it is, if you take the C off of Billy Corgan's last name, his name would be Billy Organ."
"When I was 17 I liked anyone who gave me the time of day"
"Benji swears the song "wondering" is for Cashdogg"
"Every 5 minutes a hamster is getting brutily beaten with a stick"
"They symbolize that I can do what I want. They ensure that I will never work a regular job."
"Hey, guys, I have some bad news for you. We were backing out of the parking lot and I think we ran over Lil Bow Wow. Sorry, our bad!"
"This one time, Joel was too scared to ask a girl to a dance so he had me call her up and pretend I was him.
And she said no and then she said, 'This isn't Joel, is it?' and I said, 'No its Benj!'"
"What's my official statement? My official statement is. that I've been wearing the same underwear for the the past four days!"
"I haven't taken a shower in 4 days, I guess that makes me more punk."
"When we fight, it's not about things you think we'd fight about, like music. It's about like, I'll wear Joel's socks and he'll be like,
'Dude. dude. I told you not to wear my socks, dude. You know I like my socks. Benji.Dude, oh are those my boxers, too? Dude ooh Ohh do you have to go there? Dude. dude!' And then we're, like, in the studio in this really important part of the song and I'll be like 'What do you think we should do?''I don't care are those my boxers? DUDE!"
"Hey, you guys wanna know Joel's middle name? Wanna know Joel's
middle name? Joel's middle name is Reuben!"
"Getting beat."
Interviewer: Would you ever consider turning in your instruments to learn choreography and become a boy band?
"State your position!"
"Wheres the peanut butter"
Joel: Bush
"I have not showered in a week"
"Thanks to red wine, Bob, and to are parents to doing it"
"Joel, I don't tell you this enough but I love you, You've always been my best friend, and you always will be, you're the most talented, caring person I have ever met, I think you got the better half of the egg."
"I would like to thank my parents for doing it, the red wine, Burt Bacharach, candleleight, and the egg for splitting so I didn't have to be te lead singer."
"I used to munch on sunday, but now I munch on saturday. Why saturday instead of sunday? Umm. foo (fool) because munching on saturday is trendy! hehe"
"I hope my allergies don't act up"
"Yes I'm pimpin this jacket thank you very much!"
"One time we went around the neighbourhood and stuck all the mailbox flags up! Or, or there was this one time we drove up to fast food places, ordered tons of food, paid for it, then drove off before we got it."
"If I wasn't in the band, I'd be in jail!"
"We actually grew up amish"
"Damn girl, you don't have to pinch so hard, turn around, now it's your turn!"
"I'm a goody goody. I never do bad things"
Benji: I heard about you at the bar last night, Paul. there's gonna be shaving cream to your head!
"St. Paul is not gay! He's very, very straight."
"Because I love you, because I care, because.BECAUSE.because you need clean socks!!"
"Keep representin GC, cause you know we're representin you!"
Benji: What do you think of that billy?
"You can call him Benjamin, that's what Mama calls him."
'I put rat poison in Billy's food one time"
"I'm going by Benjamin now. It sounds more mature."
"Joel is the innocent one"
" I will kiss you. I will make out with you. I will make out with anyone with boobies. Aaah besides Paul of course. That's all in the past"
Benji: "I like rockstardom. You can have girls flash you for free and have girls actually want to make out with you. But then again some guys want to make out with Joel"
Benji: "We will be back with more rock videos in a few, but first let's go to MTV news"
"Every single FRICKIN time I go anywhere these little girls come up to me and go "AAH WHERES YOUR TWIN JOEL AT?" and so now I just kinda go "Joel who? Who are you talking about?"
"And now we're back"- (Benji and Joel at exact same time)
"The All-American Rejects have a story for us here"-Benji (all american rejects say something about rocking balls and Mike busting his head on a speaker)
"Yes-we are back. you thought those annoying veejays from that dumb band were gone-but NO-we're still here."
"If we sound like uneducated idiots, its because we are."
"Leave it to JC Chazes to bring back the mullet."
Paul: "This is Paul."
"Good evening boys and girls! Welcome to the Nutcracker. This is Rob Tim, I will crack your nuts. Today I'm going to teach you a little lesson about life, the Rob Tim way."
"This is Joel at the mall. 'Hey girl, who you with? You ever heard that song 'Little Things'? Yo, that's about me, girl. Awww yeah.'"
"Yeah, on our day off we went to Disney for our first time and Joel was like a little kid. He was like 'Come on guys we have to hurry to Space Mountain!' And this morning when I walked in the bathroom, I swear I heard him singing 'When You Wish Upon A Star.'"
Torie (interviewer): "Okay cool, Well just for my general knowledge, did your parents dress you and Benji alike?"
Torie*interviewer*: "Who would you not ever go on tour with?"
(Allan and Gina are interviewers)
Benji: "If you ask Linkin Park if we're friends they'll say yes."
Billy: "Do you ever think about sauce pans?"
"You all may love Canada, I hate Canada!"
"Ballmart."
"I remember when we ah, 3 years back we did the video for or song 'Little Things',I thought it was really cheesy, right along with our first album cover, I thought that was cheesy. So I got the Wisconsin state flag tattooed on my ass." -Benji
Fan: "Joel!! Take off your shirt!"
"Go Bert, it's your birthday!"
"He dates an actor, Gwyneth Paltrow-they probably have SEX!"
Billy: "Nice moves Paul!"
"And we'll be the ugliest old couple alive, with our old tattooes and piercings and we'll still be having sex to no affects!"
"That's some good shit, I mean stuff"
"One egg, one sperm, two babies."
"We love you all."
"This song is for the girls in [insert your town here], because they mess with your head."
"Black nailpolish didn't come with testosterone."
"We don't really consider ourselves a punk rock band. Punk rock is supposed to be anti-clique, but these days, even punk rock has gotten cliquey."
"I got all the hoes!"
"You were the one who gave me those boxers? I wondered where they came from, I wear those! Although I'm not a big fan of flannel, it gets a little hot down there, if you know what I mean."
"Joel your gloves suck!"
"That's funny, we were just talking about sex!"
"That performance really moved me.I gotta go now."
"I have a confession to make: I love making out. it's fun and innocent. And besides, you can't get pregnant from making out."
"Uh.I like dogs.I have a dog.his name is Cash."
"They call me Benj, they call him Joel." from the interview from the Feastival in Philly,
*Hands me the pen* "Can I pleeeeeaaaaassssseeeee have It?" *puppy dog face*
"Aww. Thanx, you get a hug for that!"
"Corruption? What's that? No, we probably corrupted each other."
"Someone call the fire department this one's out of control!" (said while shaking his hips back and forth) (He said this outside the club they played that turned into a dance club after and u could hear techno in the back HE WAS DANCING!)
"My ass smells like Joel."
"I was in a boy band once myself.
"Yeah of course, the boxers are yummy and its the bacon that gets the gals! No wait.its the other way around."
"Stop watching them making out!"
"Hey, guys. I have some bad news for you.we were backing out of the parking lot and I think we ran over Lil Bow Wow."
"We feel really lucky right now, especially because we're so young. We feel like we can do anything, nothing can hold us back, and we've got a lot of energy."
"I'm agoraphobic.I just want someone to love me."
(During "Seasons") "I'm really feelin' those lighters." (like Fred Durst in the song "Outside") ::silence:: "Oh, come on! That was supposed to be funny!"
Little Kid: "Hey benji, will you sign my report card?"
*Pushes ring into Joel's cheek and watches it light up* "It's so purty!"
"This is a sweet song, it's for the guys of MXPX. Cuz one night, I was having a real tough night, one of the guys from MXPX invited me on his bus. He helped me out a lot, yeah, he held me all night long."
"It must be real tough to be a punk rocker in Wisconsin, you get chased by rednecks and stuff."
"This one time, Joel was too scared to ask a girl to a dance so he had me call her up and pretend I was him, and she said no and then she said 'This isn't Joel is it?' and I said, 'No it's Benj!'"
I told him I backed into a parked car on the way to a show and he said.(laughs) "Are you okay?"
"Okay, now who stole my wallet?"
"Good Charlotte is anger management teen angst."
"I don't want to see anyone leaving single tonight. I want everyone to leave impregnated."
"Tonight I'm spooning with Tom on my couch!" (referring to mxpx)
"I want all of you leave here pregnant!" (right before Seasons)
"We need wives or husbands so that we can stay in Australia." (During the Melbourne gig)
Interviewer: "Benji, with all your piercings have you got your 'Prince Albert' done?"
"That's surprising [that I smell good] seeing I haven't showered in.three weeks."
"Billy drives like an old grandma."
"You have beautiful handwriting."
"How you doin' babygurl?"
"Are you sure you don't want Joel's autograph instead?"
Paul: "St. Paul is not gay!! He's very, very straight."
"Are you SURE you're not from Waldorf? I swear I've seen you so much before."
".music is supposed to be an escape. It's supposed to be somewhere you go, where you can be yourself, or be whatever you want to be."
"Look what you did, you just made me say badass Buffalo five times."
"Yes, I am pimpin' this coat, thank you very much."
"You can only start a boy band if you kill one of the other ones already out there."
"So I wanna see all of you making out during this song."
Joel: "This song is about quitting school, quitting work, quitting everything and starting a band. A punk rock band, a ska band, any kind of band. But what do you gotta do if you wanna start a boyband?"
"I was in Menudo."
(when asked how touring has changed their lives) "I think you could say that we know more about the world, and we are now experts on the care and feeding of stinky, smelly socks." from soundbreak.com interview,
"It was the same thing, we stood in a room and picked! 'We want that guy!'"
(Singing Seasons) "Walking all along the.grass, ya told me.ah y'all I forgot the words."
"Anywhere on your leg is near the bone and that shit hurts." from hiponline interview,
"Yeah, I hurt my finger, does anyone have a Band-Aid?
"Instead of going out and shooting people, why don't you go start a band."
Canadian Radio DJ: "Do you know who the prime minister of Canada is?"
"We're definitely not jaded. We never really considered ourselves serious musicians who are changing music. We're just kids who wanted to be in a band."
"People think that I'm a really outgoing person because of how I am on stage. But I'm not. I'm really shy."
"This one's for all you emo and skater kids, we know your sensitive" ( about Motivation Proclamation)
Joel: I've sung to a girl under the stars. A song I wrote for her.
"Picture? SURE!! You want a picture? Lets take a picture!!" "You just cursed on the radio!" (Said to Joel.) - Benji
"Black nailpolish didn't come with testosterone."
Benji: "For me?"
"We can't be responsible for our good fortune though," argues Joel. "Those people who shun us just because of the label we're on, or the fact that we've got a video out there that's getting us somewhere are only limiting themselves, because they aren't keeping an open mind."
"It's very cliched to go, 'You're not punk.' We don't care if we are, and we don't care if we aren't,"
"I've flown across America, I've scaled fences, I've stood under windows and gone out of my way hundreds of times. I'm a hopeless romantic. There's no hope for me."
"People can call us sellouts, but I'm not selling out — I'm doing what I wanted to do since I was 13, and that's get on MTV and make videos and live the dream."
"I think that it is a great opportunity to see bands who pretty much the only reason they do this is to do the live show and perform for kids and just make you forget about all of the problems in your life, and just come to a show and just listen to music and don't think about anything else"
"Wisdom about the business. don't quit, keep playing everyday. If you want it as bad as you think it does, you'll work for it. I guess that works in life too, if you want it, you won't stop until you get it."
"I have a special heart in my place. I mean a special place in my heart for Avril.I am not good with words when it comes to girls!"
"Someday we will walk hand in hand down the rainbow all happy"
"I'm going to go.walk.into traffic"
"I hate you"
"Joel's a girl.even mom said so"
"My girlfriend calls him joelly moley!!"
Person: "I saw your high school pictures."
"See that? (blows air) Cold."
"Girls don't like boys, Girls like cars an money, Boys will laugh at girls when they're not funny"
"You know making videos kids" *PAUSE* "It's hard work" *PAUSE* "Have to do things like this" *PAUSE* "You might want to think twice before you" *PAUSE* "Start a rock band."
"Alright, stop this now. Gonna get. Gonna get all tear teary eyed."
"If you got married to Curt Loader your name would be Suchin Loader."
"If you do a good job there will be cake and ice cream for everyone afterwards."
Interviewer: "Can you dance?"
"Look at Joel over here. He's got a camera attached to his bike." *PAUSE* "I can hardly even steer this thing on my own!"
"Getting ready ta ride some gansta bikes."
"I went from band member to extra just like that!" *PAUSE* "It's cool." *PAUSE* "It's the story of my life."
"It's like a real party because they're all our friends. Let's see. Tony from Mest." (Tony smacks Joel on the face.) "Ow! That was Tony form Mest, and I'm gonna go kick his a** right now!" (He starts after him and there are some beeps.)
Joel: "The guys in Chevelle say they're having second thoughts about their name, which was taken from the classic Chevy muscle car, the Chevy Chevelle, which I really love."
"This is All Things Rock and I'm Benji, and this is MY show!!! ohhh yeah, and this is my little helper Joel"
Benji: (reading post) "Do you guys read actual posts or do the writers give you something?' .Do you think that we're puppets? I don't make this stuff. Some kids wrote these things on the message boards."
Benji: (talking about No Doubt's video game) "I'm buying that one."
Benji: (reading post) "Some nice person decided to post a little poll on who should get fired, me or Joel. A little contest of something."
"Could it be anymore obvious that he was reading from a cue card!? He's like this the whole time" (looks back and forth from the cue card to the camera and mocks benji*, "UH, RECENTLY."
"The screen name is GoodCharlotte7." - Joel
"I sort of feel like when people compare me to Joel even though we're twins it's like kicking me in the face and then punching me." - Benji
"Satan has a sister and she's a fan of ours?" - Benji "Stay with us or we'll have our feelings hurt." - Benji while him and Joel make puppy dog faces
"Tonight's post it goes 'hey did anyone see Benji on tuesday nights show he was scratching his ass at the end while Joel was talking, I can't believe he would do that on TV I thought it was funny'. You know you guys, I enjoy the posts I love reading the message boards but sometimes you just send in the weirdest stuff and let's try to ("for real" Joel in the background) yeah don't make up stories about me scratching my ass, let's get serious."
Fan (to Paul): "Spank you!!!
*What to wear at festivals*
Benji: "I go to take a drink of my uh, "apple juice" and uh as I'm you know…drinking it, I realize everyone's laughing and it's, it's kind of warm."
Benji: "Everyone say 'shut up Joel'
Benji: "I just want to say the disclaimer. That we are not funny guys and everything we've said is probably." Benji: "Five, four, three, two, one." (After one Benji sticks up the finger.) Joel (amazed): "You can count!"
"This song is for all the people who want to commit
suicide.well HOLD ON"
Joel: "I know what else can make you grow"
Joel: "Welcome back to All Things Rock!"
"And now it's time for Joel to stop talking."
Benji: "Theres no way that can be true, we all know I hook up with dudes."
Benji: "You know what? There's nothing wrong with making out with a girl here or there on the road."
Benji: "Alriite, Let's play the video, The Donnas, 'Who Invited You'."
Joel: "I'm Joel, this is Benji."
"Making out is all fun and games until someone swallows a tongue ring"
"Me.fail English? That's unpossible!"
"I'm not famous. You're all just crazy!
"I put on pretty good sock puppet shows and I can mime."
"My dream is to go home and stay there."
"It's ok, nobody's as much of a psycho as I am."
"Masturbation Pro-justification"
(Sydnie is a friend of GC's)
*Sydnie pinches Benji in the butt*
Benji: "Everyone calls me a fag. That hurts me inside. I think the right word is a gay." (laughs)
*Cleveland, April 18th*
*Interviewer: Cloe*
"You know whats funny?" -Joel
Benji: "My last name is scum now say that 3 times fast."
"If I were in that pit I'd be making out with everyone of you!!"
"When you get pissed off and want to beat the shit out of someone.take 3 deep breaths.then punch them in the face"
"Plaques are cool"
"We dont wanna quarel with Disturbed that would be disturbing"
"Good going Benj"
Benji: (introducing lifestyles video) "I feel like such an asshole for introducing our video."
Joel: (talking about the Evanescence "Bring Me To Life" video)
*Cloe is a Simply GC Interviewer*
"Go Benji, it's your birfday. wait if it's your birthday it's my birthday too!" - Joel
"You all call me a pervert for joking around about having love with my brother well incest fits best and guys know what guys need"
*Benji & Joel On All Things Rock*
"Benj is violent"- Joel
"One time at youth camp I shoved a gun in my ear" - Benji
"I don't knowit seems like they can read eachother's thoughts sometimes."
Joel: (talking about the Evanescence "Bring Me To Life" video) "Benj remember when you were holding that girl over ledge and you dropped her?"
Benji: "Yeah so me and Stevo (Sum 41) were prank callin Joel one night. He was so psyched cause he thought it was some chick."
"Don't bite, ya know, don't bite!"
"Did you just say there's pimp juice? Haha that's nasty!
"I like your make-up"
".Kids should take pride in being different instead of trying to fit in because we'll never fit in." "A fan grabbed me and bit me on the back of my neck. bit me like blood, ya know"
"Evanescence is hanging on at number two again" - Joel
"Let me straighten your box there (he straightens the box on Benji's Microphone)
"Remember when that time a girl like uhCalled you a girl?" - Benji
"We're gonna go back stage and make a sandwich (Then he bobs his head side to side)"
"If I could pick my wife by name, It'd be Whitney. That name just sounds right"
Benji: (to Paul) "Hey Paul" (slaps Paul in the head)
"Once Joel fell off the stage" -Benji
"Benji's motto isuhto not have a motto!"
{Riot girl playing in the backround} "The only kind of girl I plan on settling down with is a punk rock chick. How many punk rock chicks are out there?" {All girls scream} "Its a beautiful thing"
"This song is about you and you and you!!!!! Hey you! Don't look at me like that!
"I have hamsters in my pants"
"I'm the self-proclaimed member of the band, self proclaimed" (Laughs)
Interviewer: "Who's the best kisser?"
"I dont have a last name. My Last Name is Punk Rock." - Benji
Interviewer: "What's the most romantic thing you two have ever done?"
Benji: (staring at Billy) "Dude whats with your hair!"
"POOP"
Joel:" When you jam onstage.like when you move your head side to side.you look like a bobblehead!"
"When were 100 and butt ugly, we'll still be having great sex."
Interviewer- "What is your favorite girl name?"
"I want to grow old with my wife and have unstopable sex"
"Wait til we go to commercial or until Joel starts talking.he goes on."
"Which means they're really rich and could buy me stuff."
Benji: "Those guys are rich!"
"Beotch, act like you know!"
"I can juggle"
"You read dirty magazines."
Fan: (to Benji) "Is it true that you are learning Italian?" Benji and Joel: "Dildo Baggins!"
"Some guys only like girls cause they've got big fake boobies." - Benji
(Joel is practically crying with laughter when he says this, Paul and Billy are also laughing, Benji's trying not to.)
"We still got to do our calestetics." *shrugs*
"It's cool to be uncool!"
"It's also cool to pee your pants!"
"There's no room for Rock Stars in this band. What's cool about shitting on people?"
"Every morning I hear Joel singing 'wake me up inside'"
Joel: "That was our video for 'The Young And The Hopeless'" *pauses* "I had nothing to do with that."
Joel: "Hi I'm Joel. I sing."
(Talking about "Girls And Boys)":
"Look mom. I'm on TV."
Interviewer: (to billy) "You kissed an old person in the video? Did you like it?"
Paul: (to Benji and Joel) "You guys are fucked up"
"I think Benji has the coolest hair in rock"
"How are we gonna piss anybody off if we're not sexist?"
"Hey look my spit is Frappucino colored!"
"I don't know who told you that but I swear it only happened the one time. Plus, we do way crazier stuff than that!"
Benji: (about Joel) "I'm the worst of the 2 just because hes a nicer person"
"We're the nicest guys in the world."
"I wanna ride on a magical piano"
"Let me put on my leather pants and unbutton my shirt, to appear younger."
"Can we go fishing nooow??"
"Billy drives like an old grandma."
"I was in Menudo."
"Walking all along the.grass, ya told me.ah y'all I forgot the words."
"Princess!"
"Benji likes to match his hair with his underwear and we caught him in a pink thong once. We videotaped it"
"Sometimes Billy is very polite"
Benji: "Joel you're the R.Kelly of our generation"
"I may not have a dad but I have an awesome mom who gives me enough love for three dads"
"There's no room for Rock Stars in this band. What's cool about shitting on people?"
"My mom always said that there would be haters. Not everyone can love ya"
Joel: "The best thing about being famous is you get free stuff!"
"You wanna know why we don't hug? It's because Joel won't touch me. He need to use a Klennex to open the bathroom door.
"My teenage years have definitely left me with a very bitter, bad self-image. I don`t like myself. I don`t like anything I do. I don`t like my music. I don`t like anything. I enjoy playing music. I love being in a band. but if you put me alone in a room & make me look in a mirror it`s justit`s just not good enough. And we all feel that way."
Benji & Joel on How Zak Davidson Sounds like the kid next door:
"Having a little sister is cool, but what the worst part is having one."
"I played baseball, I was actually pretty good, the coach didn't think so but I was.
"The best thing is being really close. The worst thing is being really close."
"Eyeliner, it always comes in handy."
"Painted finger nails didnt really go with testosterone."
"Uh, my name is Benji... I grew up in Waldorf. Single white male. Enjoys long walks on the beach. In search of someone sensitive and caring for conversation, friendship, possible serious relationship, coffee or a good book"
"When I meet girls I like, I throw up on them."
"So you can buy these at any craft store."
"This is the get better sign."
"My ass smells like joel."
"Look! there's Joel! Theres the other one!"
"Yeah, we got kicked out of a Limp Bizkit concert....yeah, who's laughing now?"
"I'm agoraphobic. I just want someone to love me."
"I always got caught. One time, I actually got spanked for something joel did."
"Hold on you can make fun of me when im done making my point."
"We actually grew up amish."
"BEAT IT!!!!!!"
"And while were here in Orlando, we have to give a shout out to our buddies N*SYNC."
"She's so punk-y! (*shudder*)"
"We rented a car while we are here at the studio and I already put a huge scratch in it."
"I like to rip tags off mattresses."
"I usually hit my head on the wall."
"Hooked on phonics worked for me."
"Nickelback, Default, Adema, ect, ect, make me want to stick a fork in my eye."
"I dont know what I had for breakfast today. It was like.......something with wood."
"Another thing I hate is when St. Paul (Paul of GC) touches my......nevermind.
"I have to go do MY nails now."
"Positive, positive, everything is positive."
"Hi, were crazytown and we suck!"
"Were all gonna run around naked and make animal noises."
"Were not the type of band thats too cool for school."
Joel: "We were nominated for a grammy but we declined."
"We just want kids to come to our concert and forget about everything"
"Punk rockers have feelings to!"
"We've been together since the womb. We met in the womb."
"Corruption, whats that? No, we probably corrupted each other""
"Up my ass, literally"
Benji: "Hey, I like big guys ok"
"What! There goes my heart walking down the street."
Person: "Hey Billy can ya sign my arm?" Benji to Joel after a sex scene in a movie: "How did you like that scene there brother?"
Joel during a contest where girls are diving through bins of foam popcorn: "Hey that's kinda like Benji in the bathtub"
Benji: "I dont think there is anything wrong with being feminine"
"Benj, rock your body"" Benji on Joel wrestling in high school: "He just wanted to wear one of those tight uniforms."
"Why dont you come in the picture it will be more special that way." Benji: "Send joel below"
Some girl: "This question is for Benji and Joel since your twins..."
Interviewer: "Do you get along with the other band members".
Joel reading post: "This post comes from gcchick20."
"Hey guys you ready for some rock and roll?"
"You dont want to go near the inside of that, our van stinks!" Benji: "Joel likes legos" (Joel nods his head and smiles).
"Go back to the circus....FREAK!""
"That's 'sk8er' with an 8 and 'boi' with an I. Like totally!"
"When I have to settle down and get married you know im gonna hafta marry a punk rock girl. Well be 70 and listening to punk rock. We wont be able to hear each other, but well be listening to punk rock....and were gonna....well still have sex with viagra"
"On the old dog and bone"
Joel: "That was Linkin Park at #5 w/ Faint. Heard those guys were uh pickin on us when they were hosting the day"
"I look for color, style, size, texture... thickness. The breatheability of a shirt."
"I'm sitting beside you big guy (On sitting with businessmen on 1st class flights)"
Joel: "I don't have any bad habits do I?"
"You are watching Hard Rock Live, change the channel and you will die!"
"I want to see everybody square dancin"
Joel: "Benji, your a dirty dirty man!"
"I'm really vein, I like to see myself on T.V."
"Go drink your hateorade kids!"
"I must admit, I'm a gassy man."
"I have this feeling guys, this feeling that I'm gonna marry a girl from Seattle." - Benji
"Spank you Sharon Osbourne, Spank you very much!"
"Hey what are you doin those are my six" - Joel
"I am a video director, what's that slappy thing called?"
"Hey! Look! My spit's frappuccino colored!!"
"Benji is the evil twin"
"I like getting toilet paper thrown at me."
"Elijah Wood from Lord Of The Rings can't get married with a girl named Holly beacause it would make Holly Wood get it HOLLYWOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Everybody wants to try and prove were not a real band."
"3 years ago I was stocking shelves at Target, living on Ramen noodles, and crashing at Billy's house. Now I'm on tour"
"Sorry if i spit on ya'll... I kinda have a problem with doing that..." - Joel
"Stand in front of a mirrior with a dozen roses and you will see 13 of the most beautiful things" Benji (after someone proposed onstage): "Guess what they get to do ... They get to have SEX they get to have SEX!!!"
"BOOBIES!"
"Yeah, me and paul will take a picture with you. HEY PAUL! PAUL! Ok, he's not listening you'll just have to do for a picture with me"
"Nobody ever asks for a Billy hug. I guess Billy hugs aren't quiet as fun."
Billy: "Do you ever think about saucepans?"
Benji - "The other day we were eating chocolate cake and I put poop in Billy's and he ate it" Benji (to the mom): "So do your kids ever help with the cooking....I did, you help mom you get to lick the spoon..." (from Crashing with Good Charlotte)
"I don't know what I had for breakfast today. It was like......something with wood"
Joel: "I got a picture of me, Benj and Sam holdin this snap thing" (slapping his hands together)
Fan to Billy: "Can You sign my arm?"
"Your not part of that group for a reason, because your better than them."
"I like cheese"
Billy: "Yeah And For Lifestyles Sam would always give us a video postcard with something new added to it."
"If I was sitting on the couch watching tv with a girl I really liked and that video came on, I would pretend I didn't know what it was." Benji: "I used to be a dancer for Lionel Ritchie...."
"Ekkk" -
(Good Charlotte playing a show in grand rapids) Joel - "I didnt get lessons of any kind I slept through school"
Joel (pretending to eat cereal): "Benj eating lucky charms....thinking"
(During a show in Winnipeg)
"Would any of you be offended if I left?"
Joel: "...And this is the 97' album Nimrod"
"Oops, I didn't mean to hit you Joel...but I'm glad I did" Joel: "They think I'm funny mom."
"I hurt my finger does anyone have a band-aid?"
"My names not Billy, it's Ballina!"
"Never eat peanut butter first thing in the morning... it starts to get gross and ewwwww"
"lalalalalala" Joel: *Looks around nods head* "I like this place."
Joel: "Whats that little slappy thing called?"
"Revolvitating, its what the Earth does. It revolves and it rotates and its revolvitating"
"Purr i'm a sex kitten"
"My old man, right Joel?"
"Uh uh, Uh huh, uh uh"
"Asbury Park, New Jersey"
"Erm, Joel I don't think they want to see that."
"I went to the doctor today, and I told them to stick the thermometer up my butt, just like my mom used to do."
"Did you ever have food poisoning so bad that you are pissing out of your ass" "This show's an important one...we gotta be really energetic-(sniffs)- I hope my allergies dont act up"-Benji(he says this, and he sounds like he's weezing, and has a stuffy nose)
"I don't know what a lot of this is," Joel says.
*after a fan handed Benji a ring that lights up when you push it*
"I want to feel lucky every night when I go onstage, and not feel like, 'Oh, great, here we go again."
"I murdered Paul's whole family!"
"My poo came out in 3 different colors this morning!"
"Good dog!"
"I drank my own pee once"
"I must say I'm most inspired by my dog!"
Benji: "Joel, I wanna go." Joel: "Okay, now who stole my wallet?"
"I want some peanut butter covered hampsters"
"Do you like my hair?" - Benji to Emma and Lisa Joel: "You know, this is a pretty good opportunity to make out with a security guard. their not all assholes, their actually pretty nice to me" Billy: "Lets runaway to Mexico and get married." (to chris) Billy: I would be Ken so I could be on top of Barbie all day" Billy: "C'mon we have to move...the security here sucks (glares at the security guard & the security guard laughs)" Joel (somewhere): "What the fuck are those clams?"
Joel (at a store): "This store reminds me of the toys I played with when I was little." Joel: "I've sung to a girl under the stars."
"No offence guys but none of us are really that cool."
"They think im funny ma!"
"I'm moving to Sacramento tomorrow."
"I love the name Jessica it reminds me of my ex who was hot"
"I'm learning french. Bonjour Biatch. Au Revour Biatch"
"OK, now who stole my wallet." Billy: "I was running across the stage and I tripped over our bass player Paul's cord and did a Superman across the stage. I felt so stupid, but then I got up and did it again going the other way!"
"I read Harry Potter"
"And some nookie, yo!"
"Hi Brucey"
Person: "Hi Billy!"
"Me, fail English? Thats unpossible"
Joel: "Dude, are those my socks?"
"Shit happens!!!
Joel: "We can say anything? ANYTHING? Okay. Who wants to fuck Billy?"
Benji: "Joel you suck"
Ashley: "It's ok I'm just stupid."
Benji: "I love Billy."
"I'm the best man alive! Beethoven bows to me!!!!!!!"
"We try and put are fans first"
"Somehow I thought the red pants were cool"
Melissa: (at the GC concert/autograph signing) "OMG!! Benji your soo hott I would do you any day."
"And you're being a bitch about it!"
Dave Berry (interviewer): "So, have you ever dated any celebs?
"I think if we have one more argument about clothes, then we will have to split up"
"Have I seen any moves lately? What does that have to do with guitars?!"
"Wlways wear cute pajamas to bed, 'cause you
never know who you'll meet in your dreams."
On the radio....
(During Intimate and Interactive at MuchMusic)
"It's cool to piss your pants."
"Blow and it will go away. Blow and it will go away. BLOW ON THE STUPID SPIDER!!"
Joel: "I sang to a girl under tha stairs and i wrote a song for her"
"I think Chris had the most fun. He just likes breaking things."
"G to the mother fucking C"
"C'mon people. What have we come to. I mean, Ryan Cabrara? Seriously, what have we come to."
"He has more talent in one finger than you do in your whole BODY!"
"I Got Pregnant while watching that video. Yeah, I'm Pregnant right now."
Joel: "Cheers London"
"I'm only 23, but I feel like I've lived a lot already, I had a conversation with my dad, and he was telling me how he really felt like I was still the same person. I've always felt like that, but it's nice to hear it from someone like that."
"Between all the stuff that we're doing, Billy will always have a job for me, and Joel will have a job for me. I'll pack the toys,"
"One thing I never worry about is money. Because I have my health and my family and I can always go back to work,"
"These are my back up dancers. Hit it boys! (The band starts dancing)
"Princes"
"I want to ask you guys a serious question! Will you be my life partner?"
"Look kids.....this is what you're missing backstage"
"Yeah, I kissed your girlfriend Benji, but don't worry i didn't like it...she used to much tongue."
"See, look kids I give you my blood."
Benji: "Because i love you, because it's a must, because, BECAUSE YOU NEED CLEAN SOCKS!!!"
"I think you know the answer to that."
"ROCK & SEX DUDE!"
"I feel like such a hippy, oooh the world is black, everything sucks"
"Benji likes to match his hair with his underwear... one time we caugt him wearing a pink thong, we video taped it"
"I'm scared of cops."
"Final scene I gotta keep it jiggy on the dance floor"
"Never! AHHHH I'M SO SAD!!!!"
"Dude, I've just woken up duuuude"
Band/Singer Quotes Page 1
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